Raising Kids in an Interfaith Home
Our top resources for parenting kids who are “both”!
by Jewish Gentile Couples I July 9, 2026
As an interfaith couple, how can you raise your children with a strong sense of identity? And speaking of … which identity will you pass on?
Traditionally, Jewish-Gentile couples have chosen to lean one way or the other. Often, the two parents would work together to try to raise the children in a Jewish home out of a desire for Jewish continuity. Sometimes (especially in regions with sparser Jewish populations), the Jewish partner would “abdicate” and the children would be raised culturally as Christians. In her book “Being Both,” Susan Katz Miller surmises that previous generations felt pressure to choose one religion or the other. This may have been partly due to the lack of community for families who are Jewish and.¹
But today, more and more cross-cultural couples are choosing to raise the children with a strong sense of both heritages. There are ways to do this beyond a casual knowing that sounds like, “Oh, my dad is Jewish and my mom is Christian, that’s nice.” We can raise interfaith children with true spiritual depth and connectedness. This enables our kids not only to understand the family stories they’ve inherited from both parents, but also to have wisdom for what they’ll choose to pass on to their children!
Here are some resources (some ours, some we recommend) for raising children in an interfaith home.
Celebrate Holidays Together
When you’re intermarried, it can be difficult to decide whose holidays to celebrate. But you can explore the biblical holidays through the lens of being both.
The Jewish (Old Testament) holidays were always intended to bring people together (take Passover’s “mixed multitude,” for example). But sometimes bringing everyone to the table—and knowing how to make sure they all feel included—can be tricky.
So, we’ve written a free guide just for you. It walks you through the year of biblical holidays. Download yours for our best inspiration for recipes, stories, activities, and more!
Shabbat Guide
Shabbat is a time for families to come together. Whether you’re setting three seats at the table or thirty, you can have fun going through the different steps of Shabbat together. It’s a time of unity and rest: from the meal planning and prep, to sitting down together, to taking a day (or a couple hours!) off our normal work. Check out this guide we wrote especially for interfaith couples like you.
Bar/Bat Mitzvah
This can be an area of confusion for many Jewish-Gentile couples. Should or shouldn’t our children go through a formal b’nei mitzvah course? And the children themselves may have their own opinions (as children often do!).
The good news is, becoming bar or bat mitzvah is a way to foster a sense of Jewish identity in an interfaith child. And today, there are more resources for exploring that identity—such as mentoring programs that can include the non-Jewish parent and elements of Christian faith.
One of our partner ministries has written this great resource to inform you and your partner (and that preteen of yours!) as you consider your options. Read more here!
Going Back to the Beginning
For families who are actively seeking to connect to both their Christian beliefs and their Jewish roots, there are spiritual resources. For instance, the hope of a Messiah is a Christian idea and a Jewish one, and has been from the very beginning of both traditions.
And we’ve been surprised by how much we learned when exploring the idea of Messiah from the very first book of the Bible—Genesis!
We recommend the “Beginnings in Genesis” devotional, which is perfect for all ages. Grab your copy and sit down together with a Bible, a pencil (or crayons!) and your favorite tea or cocoa. It’s even got great discussion questions to help get you talking as you read about God’s plan for the redemption of his people!
Personalized Coaching
In an interfaith relationship, both of you bring your unique perspectives and cultures to the table.
Jewish Gentile Couples offers relationship coaching that’s tailored for the two of you—it’s a place to be seen, learn ways to communicate, and navigate tricky topics together. We believe you can actually find ways to celebrate what it means to be both—and pass that on to your children!
Our coaches all come from backgrounds that include Jewish life and faith in Jesus. We work in multiple regions and serve in different specialties. Sign up to be matched with your coach today. In some cases, we can even connect you with local community—in any case, we can’t wait to talk with you!
This is just the beginning!
We’ve got info on lots more—from summer camps for kids of varied ages to mentoring programs that go all through the year! Reach out to learn more.
End Notes
Susan Katz Miller, Being Both (Boston: Beacon Press, 2014).
